Mums had Alzheimer’s now for about 4 years. Sometimes I struggle remembering what she was like before. Mum cared for nan and grandad and when they both passed away, I honestly think that’s what triggered her dementia. It’s weird to think mum knew anyone and everyone in the village and everyone knew her. It’s weird to think her doing her job at the council and then at the local school, all that trust and responsibility. Such poles apart to now.
It really pisses me off when I hear friends moan about their mums. They don’t know how lucky they are to have help with childcare, have a mum to go shopping with on a Saturday afternoon, someone to turn to to ask questions about their little ones. If I’m totally honest I know I’m jealous. I hate to admit it. Getting married and having a baby without mum by my side like any normal mum has been tough. It’s had me in tears more times than I care to remember. I’m only 28, she’s only 63 – we’re both too young to be going through this. I just wish mum was mum. Wowzers she’d idolise my son if she was “normal”.
As a kid I remember mum being the soft one, and dad being the strict one. Mum always got on well with my friends, always used to ferry us around to parties when we were teenagers, she was a really cuddley mum. There was nothing a mum cuddle couldn’t make better. I can still remember that feeling of knowing everything was going to be ok when she hugged me.
Mum’s laugh lit up any room. She’d say the silliest things, and have us all in hysterics. She loved cooking. I remember baking cakes with her most weekends, something I’ll do with my son when he’s a bit older. She came to every school play, every dance show, anything I was doing she was there front row supporting me. Nothing or no one ever came before me or my brother. I see that now. And as a mum I realise why she did everything she did. I hope I’m a good mum to M like my mum was to me. NMC
Mums Memory 